Honolulu Lite
One effect of recent headline-grabbing international events is that they have knocked a lot of otherwise perfectly newsworthy-type news off the front page. Gridiron show rakes
muck with gleeFor some people, that's a good thing. Remember a guy named Gary Condit? He was the U.S. congressman who had an affair with an intern who then disappeared. It was "all-Condit, all the time" coverage for some television networks. Now he's completely off the news weasels' radar screen.
The same thing has happened locally. Remember Andy Mirikitani and his federal conviction? Remember Rene Mansho and her campaign fund-raising problems? Remember what's-his-name, who got busted for doing something-or-other to somebody?
As much as the subjects of local controversy would love people to forget their trespasses, a ragtag gang of local news reporters and celebrities will helpfully dredge up all that dirty linen and plop it right onstage at the Diamond Head Theatre this weekend for "Gridiron Show 2001."
The theme is "Reporters Strike Back," which is something of a misnomer. It should be "Reporters Strike AGAIN!" since they were in on the kill from the get-go.
I've been part of the show in the past, so I can report that it is a hilarious night of fun and goodhearted parody, at least from the point of view of the entertainers. I somehow didn't get the call to participate this year, which I'm sure was no reflection on my past performances, although I wouldn't put money on it. Nevertheless, I've been leaked some of the song lyrics, and I can honestly say that I am happy I am not Andy, Jon, Rene, Jeremy, Linda, Ben, Bobby, Mazie, Evan, Haunani or a member of the St. Louis football team.
Other targets include the two daily newspapers (just for balance), the state teachers strike, the HPD food scandal and "Baywatch Hawaii." (I thought that by now, "Baywatch" would be virtually parody-proof.) "Andy -- The Musical" looks promising with such lines as "Consider yourself a con, consider yourself, part of O-triple-C" (to the tune of "Consider Yourself").
Songbird Cathy Foy and wordbird Gordon Pang -- made up as Mirikitani and Mansho -- will sing a sensitive duet based on the "All in the Family" song "Those Were the Days." (Sample: Andy: "Family helped me buy the vote." Rene: "Had my staffers greet the boat." Both: "Bob Watada's such a dolt. Those Council days.")
For tickets to the Friday and Saturday shows, call 524-6441, ext. 10, or e-mail cristina@brightlightmarketing.com. Proceeds benefit the Society of Professional Journalists Hawaii Chapter and student internships and scholarships.
Remember, those who forget the past are doomed to miss out on a lot of fun.
Alo-Ha! Friday compiles odd bits of news from Hawaii
and the world to get your weekend off to an entertaining start.
Charles Memminger also writes Honolulu Lite Mondays,
Wednesdays and Sundays. Send ideas to him at the
Honolulu Star-Bulletin, 500 Ala Moana Blvd., Suite 7-210,
Honolulu 96813, phone 235-6490 or e-mail cmemminger@starbulletin.com.
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