MAN, you try to let a new television show run for awhile, get its legs underneath it, so to speak, before you write about it and -- BAM! -- it's off the air. My fantasy is to save
Mr. RoarkeI'm talking about "Wind on Water," the Big Island/Bo Derek production that was yanked this week after a grand run of two shows.
I read the reviews of the show's pilot episode, which ranged from vicious to merciless. "Baywatch Meets Bonanza" was the usual one-line critique, which would seem a pretty damn good combination considering Bonanza was one of the longest-running Westerns in tube history and "Babewatch," er, "Baywatch," continues to be the WORLD'S top-watched show, even in Muslim countries.
But it wasn't to be. "Wind" never became a ratings hurricane. In fact, it never reached tropical storm status.
I'll admit that I am fairly easy to please. And, maybe it's because there was so much negative stuff written about "Wind" that I didn't find last week's episode at all vomitous. In fact, I thought it was well-done, given the necessities of today's programming (i.e., showing off sparsely clad young people doing exciting things on dangerous machines, large animals or in angry seas.)
The profusion of action scenes on everything from motorcycles to surfboards was a bit overwhelming. I fully expected Bo to bungie-jump off Don Ho by the end of the show. (Which makes one wonder what happened the first time those two were introduced: "Bo, Ho ... Ho, Bo.")
The third star (behind Derek and Lee Horsley) -- the scenery -- held up its end of the production bargain exceedingly well. Hawaii, per usual, looked fabulous.
It's too bad that they didn't put this show in a less competitive time slot until it could work out its kinks (or add a few) and build up a following before sending it into prime time. It seems silly to spend millions on a new show just to offer it up to the prime-time meat grinder.
Speaking of prime time, Hawaii's OTHER offering, "Fantasy Island," also seems to be on the verge of a fatal implosion.
That's too bad, because "Fantasy Island" is the best show made in Hawaii since "Byrds of Paradise" (another fine show slaughtered on the Prime Time Altar). I'm not just rooting for the home team here. I've trashed plenty of turkeys filmed in or about Hawaii, like "Big Wave Dave's," which was filmed in a wave-free Los Angeles studio.
But Malcolm McDowell's "Mr. Roarke" is one of the most darkly funny characters on television. This show has got to be given a chance, even if it means putting it in a different time slot so that it is not having to compete against mindless docu-freak shows like "America's Most Wanted" and "Cops." People watch shows like "Cops" for the same reason they slow down to look at traffic accidents. It's not entertainment, it's "must see" blood 'n' guts.
I just don't understand why anyone would invest the kind of time, talent and money they are investing in "Fantasy Island" just to let it get run over by serial killers in getaway cars. (Or, worse, video of winos being arrested for shoplifting at convenience stores.)
I don't know if "Wind on Water" would have made it, even though it was better than a lot of the crapola that's been running for years.
But it is not a pipe dream to think that "Fantasy Island" can make it, if it is allowed to find its audience. Or better yet, if its audience is allowed to find it. The same viewers who made "Twin Peaks," "Northern Exposure," "Picket Fences" and other slightly odd, wonderfully written shows successful will storm the beach of "Fantasy Island" if given half a chance.
Charles Memminger, winner of
National Society of Newspaper Columnists
awards in 1994 and 1992, writes "Honolulu Lite"
Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
Write to him at the Honolulu Star-Bulletin,
P.O. Box 3080, Honolulu, 96802
or send E-mail to charley@nomayo.com or
71224.113@compuserve.com.
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