

WE'VE heard a lot of talk about what the American people want, as if the "American people" were a bunch of cookies from the same cutter or a bunch of Beanie Babies, different colors and shapes, but essentially the same and only good if you collect the whole set. My fellow Americans,
speak up!Polls show that 60 percent of the American people are complete idiots. Or maybe it's just the 60 percent of the people who ever are polled. I've never met one person who was polled. I am beginning to believe that there are 1,000 people across the country who are official "pollies." Their job is to be polled. And 60 percent of these official pollies believe aliens have visited the earth, gravity is a vast right-wing conspiracy and the new "Donny and Marie Show" is the best thing on television.
Anytime someone starts telling me what the "American people" want, I run screaming from the room. Truth be told, if you actually asked each of the 270 million or so Americans what they want, it would to be left the hell alone. I'll bet the American people are tired of being used by politicians and pundits who are simply trying to bolster their own personal agendas. When you've got left-wing wackos like Newsweek's Eleanor Clift and right-wing wackos like CNN's Pat Buchanan both claiming to know what "the American people" want, you've got trouble.
Let's forget for a moment about what "the American people" want and think about the country itself. While you can't lump all Americans into one basket, individuals can have their own concept of the country. For instance, in the 1700s, many thought of America as a young, idealistic freedom fighter. In the 1800s, some people thought of the country as two countries, one in favor of slavery and the other against it. And in the early 1900s, many people thought of America as an imperialistic bully
I wonder how people view the country today. And so, I propose the following test: Imagine the United States as a single person with certain specific attributes. Send me a card, letter or e-mail describing this person. Don't send me any wishy-washy feel-good malarkey about the person being a rainbow-colored, gender-neutral champion of all mankind.
I'll give you an example of what I'm talking about. Probably because I'm a guy, I would see America as a man. I see him being about 50 years old, a little battle scarred with wisdom that has come from a lifetime of tough experiences.
During his younger years, he made some mistakes. He was rash, valiant, self-absorbed, politically naive and culturally myopic. He treated some people poorly, and now realizes he was wrong. But he also basically had a good heart and was courageous. Now, he's learning to look at the bigger picture. He still has some problems, but is mature enough to face them head-on. And he's determined not to repeat the mistakes of the past.
If that sounds idealistic, it is. This whole exercise is about ideals. But I would expect each person to have his own vision of the country as a single individual. How do you see the country? As someone who has overcome tough challenges and now is entering the golden years wiser? Or as a youth, oblivious to the past and clueless about the future?
Jot your thoughts down on a card or e-mail them to (71224.113@compuserve.com). I will run some of the more thoughtful, or at least not legally actionable, responses in upcoming columns. Describe your person by any means you deem appropriate (gender, age, race, body parts, clothing, political leanings, etc). But explain WHY you view the person this way. Since this column goes out worldwide via starbulletin.com, maybe we will hear how readers in other countries would construct the real person called America.
Charles Memminger, winner of
National Society of Newspaper Columnists
awards in 1994 and 1992, writes "Honolulu Lite"
Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
Write to him at the Honolulu Star-Bulletin,
P.O. Box 3080, Honolulu, 96802
or send E-mail to charley@nomayo.com or
71224.113@compuserve.com.
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