AS if she had any choice in the matter, my pre-teen often wants to debate the advantages and disadvantages of being female. After many hours of spirited discussion, we have finally agreed on the following generalizations. Athletes do whatever
they want—almostThe disadvantages of being female are that women have less physical strength, are more often judged on looks rather than brains, make less pay, do more housework and have monthly menstruation periods.
The advantages of womankind are that we are more nurturing and compassionate, are better communicators, live longer, are less combative and can have babies.
But the biggest upside is that we don't "waste" a lot of valuable time and energy on something that consumes the male of the species: following professional sports.
In fact, with all due respect to my colleagues in the sports section, armchair jocks take their games way too seriously.
Consider this rigamarole over Latrell Sprewell, who was fired from the Golden State Warriors (that's a basketball team, gals) after assaulting his coach and threatening to kill him. The Warriors not only terminated Sprewell's four-year, $32 million contract, but the NBA suspended him from play for an entire year. Converse also fired him as an endorser and spokesman for the shoe company.
Sports writers, editors and fans all over the nation cheered these disciplinary actions. The sentiment is thus: How dare a player strike his coach! Who does he think he is? Yes, he rightly should be kicked off his team and out of the league!
When will we see this same outrage when athletes misbehave and break the law in public? For some reason, there are two standards of acceptable behavior: one for high-paid jocks who bask in monetary and societal adulation, and one for the rest of us.
Professional athletes have been charged with and/or been found guilty of crimes such as murder, rape, domestic violence, driving under the influence, fighting, you name it.
But as soon as his no-no comes to light, the powers-that-be attempt to hit the switch. Teammates and coaches paint him as a good guy. His family members and business reps rally to his defense. And most of all, fans and boosters almost always take his side, especially if the complainant is a woman.
In other words, she must be lying. Or the ever-popular: She must have asked for it.
Mike Tyson, a brute posing as a boxer, allegedly beat his wife and other female acquaintances before he was finally sent to prison for sexual assault. Yet, soon after being sprung, he was fighting for a purse worth millions of dollars.
So lemme get this straight: It's OK to hurt your opponent. It's OK to display machismo in relationships with women. But it's not OK to punch your coach? That's a fine line that confused even Latrell Sprewell.
IN a recent column, Eileen McNamara of the Boston Globe described how a 23-year-old Maynard woman was injured during a rock concert, when three huge New England Patriots players, including a 300-pound lineman, jumped from the stage into a mosh pit and landed on top of her.
Tameeka Messier suffered two crushed disks in her neck. But police, prosecutors and team officials are trying to talk the football players out of trouble because, hey, it's almost playoff season.
Too bad Tameeka wasn't a New England Patriots coach. Then those three lugs would be in real trouble.