I'M going to save President Clinton a lot of time and argument with Congress and personally apologize to all African-Americans for slavery. Clinton a slave
to empty apologiesThere. It's done. Get back to work, Bill. What? I can't apologize for slavery? I'm not the government? Baloney. I have more right to apologize for slavery than the government because the government can't feel bad or good about anything. The government is a cold collection of laws and big brick buildings. People live and work in the buildings. They frame and enforce the laws. But government itself can't apologize for anything. People have to apologize. And the people who should have apologized for slavery are the people who had slaves. Unfortunately, slave owners, at least the white American variety, are all dead.
Nevertheless, in his endless quest to dance away from various scandals by making pointless calls for dialogue on every feel-good subject under the sun, Clinton has decided to put on his worry face and fret about whether the U.S. government should apologize for slavery. It makes him seem sensitive and caring.
It's baloney. After all, he apologized to Hawaiians for the U.S. overthrow of the islands and what did that do? It made the Hawaiians feel good for a few minutes. But do Hawaiians now all have their own Hawaiian Homes lots and houses? Has there been reparation? Nope.
This apology thing is just Clinton good-guy camouflage used to take everyone's attention away from things like the economy, Paula Jones and campaign finance violations.
THE bottom line is that time marches on and it leaves a lot of pain in its wake. We can look back and feel bad about certain parts of history but we can't change them. For instance, I'm still kind of ticked off that Napoleon tromped through Germany in 1802 and killed my great- great-great-great-grandfather, who was a foot soldier protecting his country. Do I want an apology from Jacques Chirac? No.
That's the thing. Instead of dwelling on past wrongs, we should be doing something to improve life today for everyone.
I'll bet that any down-and-out relatives of former slaves today would rather own their own home than receive a meaningless apology from Clinton. Here's an idea, why not turn all government housing into private condominiums and then legally transfer the title of ownership to the people who live in them? Hey, France, pay my mortgage for a year and we'll forget all about Napoleon's rampage across my homeland.
If Clinton wants to show he's against slavery, why doesn't he do something about it today? Slavery still exists in parts of Africa, where certain tribes buy and sell their ethnic enemies. How about punishing China for using prison slave labor? Instead, Clinton awards China with Most Favored Nation status. Ah. He's only against slavery that happened 150 years ago, not slavery today.
And speaking of slavery of long ago, is Clinton also prepared to apologize to Irish Americans? Many of them came to America as indentured servants in the 1700s, forced to endure all the accouterment of slavery, like floggings and chains.
And maybe Clinton should apologize that Abraham Lincoln actually wasn't so keen on getting rid of slavery from the get-go. In fact, Lincoln said that if he could have maintained the Union without freeing slaves, he would have done it. And in fact, his Emancipation Proclamation only freed Southern slaves, so maybe Clinton better apologize to the kin of Northern slaves twice.
I'll save him the trouble. I'm sorry that the people who ran the government in the early part of this country's history were idiots when it came to dealing with all human beings. There. Now, let's move on and see what we can do to help people today.