THE real NBA season begins tomorrow, the Who will win the NBA?
Sorry, Charleslarge gentlemen seriously stuffing the ball into the basket.
That means it is also time for Fitz's Fearless Forecast of the playoffs.
So I have spent many, many hours of grueling consultation with my expert advisory panel of taxi drivers, bartenders and exotic dancers.
I can't remember much of what they said -- maybe the loud music was a factor in all three of their respective arenas -- but it was still some extremely interesting research.
Since I did so poorly in the recent NCAA basketball tournament pools, I have added my longtime friend "L.A. Ray" to my NBA forecasting team. Ray hasn't lost an NBA bet in several years, or maybe he hasn't won one in several years, but he still spends countless hours on his couch watching game after game and lobbing heavy objects at the TV.
And, as always, the mandatory warning: Do not wager your stereo, pet bird or favorite auntie on any of these predictions.
They are: FOR AMUSEMENT ONLY.
EASTERN CONFERENCE: The Bulls might get a battle from the Bullets -- especially with Chicago product Juwan Howard fired up. But Dennis Rodman and Toni Kukoc will be back. And Washington will be gone in four games.
Miami and Orlando should be a good series. But watch for Pat Riley's bangers to send Penny Hardaway and his guys packing. At least it saves the Magic from choking later in the playoffs.
The Knicks and Hornets is a very interesting matchup. Glen Rice might be the most underrated player in the world. Charlotte can shoot the threes with the best of them. But Mugsy Bogues and Dell Curry are hurting, so I'll go with the Knicks in a wild five-game set.
Atlanta against Detroit? Who cares? The Hawks finished strong, so I'll take Hot Lanta over the Grant Hill one-man show in four games.
In round two, the Bulls will clobber Atlanta, maybe in four quickies. But Miami will be the new East title series foe by outmugging Ewing and the Knicks in seven rough games.
Bulls and Heat? Let me think about this one for at least a split second. Time's up. Bulls win, but it takes six games.
Seattle and Phoenix is a very interesting matchup. At the beginning of the regular season,
I wrote that the Sonics might actually match the Bulls in talent and performance -- and even beat them in the finals. Why would I make such a dumb prediction? Too much tequila.
Anyway, here's an early upset: Phoenix over the Sonics in five.
Houston and Minnesota is a mismatch, despite the Wolves' bright future. I'll take the Rockets in three easy ones.
The Lakers and Portland? Can Shaq hit a free throw in the clutch? No way. I like the rejuvenated Blazers in five games over the overrated Lakers.
In round two, I'll take the Jazz over the Blazers in five games.
The Rockets -- who are gladly out of the spotlight so far -- will put Phoenix away in five games.
Utah against Houston will be a great conference final with a bunch of big names on both sides.
I like Hakeem Olajuwan and the Rockets over Karl Malone and the Jazz in seven great games.
Now we have a Bulls-Rockets war in the finals, which would be another great match.
Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen and Rodman against Olajuwan, Clyde Drexler and Charles Barkley. Now that would be a classic series.
Who will win it in the end? One name still stands out when it counts the most. The greatest player of all time.
Fit Mr. Jordan for another championship ring. The Bulls in seven games.