Photo by George F. Lee Star-Bulletin
Donna and Doug Hahn adopted Christi Jo Chan-Hi,
now 2, from Korea.
Jana Wolff's book "Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother" (Andrews and McMeel, 1997, $16.95) concerns open, transracial adoption.
Open adoption is where the adoptive parents know one or both birth parents. Transracial is how Wolff describes her own adoption of a part African-American boy, Ari Yona Wolff. She and husband Howard Wolff are Caucasian.
The book is a shoot-from-the-hip, no-holds-barred, stream-of-consciousness discussion about the adoption process. Twenty-six chapters range in subject from infertility to meeting the birth mother, attending the birth and circumcision.
"Being black and Jewish, our son is a member of at least two minorities," she writes about 6-year-old Ari. "The situation my son was born into gave him no choice but to become a hybrid of ethnicities, cultures, and expectations. Poor kid. ... He has to deal with the unlikely combination that we've helped to make him."
She writes of holding her baby, telling him "that his 'Mommy loves him.' It's a little awkward to say, but I figure that it's true, no matter which mommy it is."
In the chapter on "Friendly Racism -- Are they staring, or am I paranoid?" she writes, "I can try to teach Ari about his Mexican-American and African-American heritage, but I cannot be a part of either. His birth parents would provide him with that firsthand advantage. Unfortunately, they chose not to. So here we are, white parents of a multi-racial son and, therefore, members of a racially integrated family living in a racially segregated society. ...
"I used to explain that Ari was half Hispanic, a quarter African-American, and a quarter Caucasian. Which he is. But I came to realize that nobody cares about percentages, and multiculturalism is disconcerting when what people want are labels: singular categories. In spite of his rich ethnic blend, Ari is perceived as black. And we need to help him learn what that means."
Written as a journey of self-knowledge, Jana Wolff sold the manuscript to a publisher at a Maui Writers Conference. This ghost writer is ghost no more.
Jana Wolff signs "Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother"
Place: Borders Ward Centre