Corwin
"You know," I said, "back in the '70s when I was a reporter on the Big Island, I interviewed a young fellow named Veriato who was about to take a shot at the regular PGA tour. He must have been the son of the guy going on the senior tour."
"No," Kwon said, "it's the same guy. He was on the regular tour for a little while, then became a golf pro in Texas."
"It can't be the same guy," I said. "The guy I interviewed was a young guy - about my age."
"Duh," said my wife, Maggie, as my dottering brain began to grasp the concept that I wasn't a young guy anymore myself. I, too, was nearly old enough - not good enough, mind you, but old enough - to play the senior tour.
And so it was that young Corwin was absolved of all responsibility for making his grandpa feel old when he checked in at 9:25 p.m. Monday.
It put some pressure on me. We old folks in general, and grandfathers in particular, are supposed to be repositories of knowledge and wisdom. I was supposed to be full of sage advice to pass on to my new grandchild. I felt some urgency to get it done before my brain decayed further.
I had a long night to think about it and realized I didn't know as much as I thought I should about life's mysteries. Advising a young child new into the world is a heavy responsibility - worthy of only one's best material. So Corwin, I'm keeping it short and limiting it to the stuff I'm sure of:
To learn to write: Read a lot as you're growing up. The writing will take care of itself.
To hit a baseball: Never fear the pitcher or the ball. Keep moving and stay loose in the batter's box. Time the pitcher's windup with a routine of your own that gets you coiled and ready to spring at the ball just as the pitcher is coiled to release the ball. Once you commit yourself, don't hold back. Swing aggressively. Try to see the ball hit the bat.
To accumulate wealth: Get a job that pays more than you can possibly spend. The previous advice should be helpful. If that fails, put a little bit in a good growth mutual fund every chance you get. You'll be amazed how it piles up.
To find fulfillment: Serve others before you serve yourself. Follow the Golden Rule: "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you." There is some version of this ethic in virtually every religion and culture. It is the best single piece of advice mankind has ever concocted.
To build character: When you know what the right thing is, do it. Every time. People today are too quick to excuse themselves for not doing what they know to be the right thing. Somebody has to lead the way. It may as well be you.
THAT'S about it, Corwin. I should add that you need to always respect your parents, Treena and Dan. They'll screw up sometimes, but they love you and they're trying their best to raise you well.
You also need to always find the time to listen to your grandpa's war stories, no matter how boring they may seem. Sooner or later, he'll get to his point.
Being born is tough work. You had it especially hard fighting that touch of pneumonia. So why don't you take a few weeks to rest up before you start looking for a job?
